Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Watch me bleed.

I've managed to control my temper most of the time, but today
I just snapped. Maybe, I just couldn't stand your constant insults anymore.
You know who you are. It hurts, though I know you don't mean them.
And though they weren't direct to me, it was towards something I liked. Alot. And you knew that.
You're my best friend and you know practically everything about me.
But I'm human too. I have feelings.

I don't know what's been wrong with me for the last few weeks,
My moods have been fluctuating more than usual,
I've been feeling worse than usual,
And I can't help but wonder about stuff that I had thought was unimportant to me any longer.
Apparently not.

Basically I've just been a jumbled up mess. Empty.
Sometimes I feel like I'm watching my life as it speeds by me.
Almost like I'm not in my own body.
Right now I just want the perfect clarity. I want bliss.

Plus, the lyrics of All Hail The Heartbreaker have been replaying over and over and over.....

ugh. i sound so whiny and depressive. Must be the loneliness. Oh I hate feeling lonely.

3 comments:

Bernardine said...

Cheer up. :)

Bernardine said...

It scares me too. I heard we only have like what, 5-6 years more to go? And the world would just be all pitched black. And so will our bodies.

I don't wanna die so soon. :( I don't wanna die a virgin and I don't wanna die without knowing who I'll marry. I don't wanna die without feeling the pain of giving birth to my pretty babies. I don't wanna die and go to hell.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I'm scared.

Bernardine said...

SAVE THE WORLDDDDDD. And me. :D And you of course, hehe. I'm so retarded. Sorraaayy. :)